Thursday, January 27, 2011
Roller Coaster of life
This year has already had its excitement. Around the 17th of January Kade got laid off. This happened right after I had decided not to go back to work, so I could stay home with Drake. So I knew for a while things would be tight and a struggle as Kade looked for work. Now last year it took Kade quite a while to find a decent job, thanks to the wonderful economy. This has been another bit of encouragement for both of us to get an education.
Well we decided to fast, pray, and give it to God. I am a worrier by nature. So it is a constant struggle for me not to fester over what I can't change. This time I think I did a good job, we did what we could and left the rest up to the big guy. About a week later Kade was already busy with a new job. He is a foreman for a repo janitorial service. So cleans out and fixes repossessed homes. It is actually a lot of fun! He gets to do physical work, and I know he enjoys it a lot more than talking on the phone all day. By the end of the day he is tired but happy. We are crossing our fingers that everything works out.
You can kinda see the trailer filled with junk in the back round
But for sure I am starting school at ISU in the fall, I have missed school and can't wait to go back. :D
Thursday, January 6, 2011
Drake's Birth Story
This is really long...mostly for record purposes. So I would be surprised if you really endured it and read it all. Sorry if it is too graphic. I want to be able to look back and read something to help me remember all the things that took place.
On Sunday December 5th Kade and I were driving home from Blackfoot,where we had been visiting my parents. About twenty minutes from home, around 10:15 PM, I felt a painful contraction. Now, I had had a lot of false labor, but none of my contractions hurt. I told Kade, these might be the real thing. Kade just laughed because it wasn't the first time I had told him this.
When we got home I was having regular contractions about every 6 minutes, we made a trip to Wal-Mart to walk around. That didn't last long, I could hardly walk. So we went home. Around 12:30 AM I called my doula the contractions were about 5 minutes apart and not even a minute in length at this time. She suggested a bath to see if my contractions would stop. This way we would know if it was really labor. I got in the bathtub to see if I could alleviate some of the pain, and for a while I thought my contractions actually stopped.
I called the doula to update her around 12:45 AM telling her that I felt my contractions had stopped during the bath but they had started again after I got out. She told me she was worried it wasn't true labor, because the contractions calmed in the tub and that I should wait to go to the hospital. She said "wait a half hour and call me back to update me".
Around 1:15 AM I called her again because I was still havingcontractions, she told me to wait to go to the hospital till they were 3 to 4 minutes apart and to let her know if anything changed, she still wasn't sure if it was the real thing.
Not long after I decided that the pain was bad enough that I was going to go to the hospital. I figured THIS WAS IT!!!
We got there around 2:00 AM, Kade called the doula to let her know where we were. When the nurse first checked me I was dilated to 3cm. I had to lie in bed while they monitored my contractions and the baby’s heartbeat, and they asked me a BILLION questions, it took forever. I thought I was going to die, I was in a lot of pain. I was so excited when they told me I could get back into the tub. Then I felt a lot more comfortable and it was easier to deal with the pain.
Around 3:15 AM I was sitting in the tub and had a hard contraction, and my water broke. Then I got really sick and Kade held the trash can for me while I emptied my stomach. I remained nauseous and sick for the entire labor and delivery. When my membranes ruptured it was a yummy color of green. I let the nurses know so they could make the proper precautions when the baby was born. They had suctions ready for him in case he inhaled any fecal matter.
The nurse then made me get out of the tub, which was too bad because it felt super good to soak. I was very grumpy through the whole thing and I am not sure how Kade handled me, I got quite mean. I was not one of those people who think every little labor pain is a miracle and a blessing. It was painful, way more so than I expected. I thought for sure I would have labor pain...but didn't count on all of it being back labor. I am proud to say thought that I didn't curse at all during labor, GO ME! But that was my only accomplishment.
After she forced me out of the tub the nurse made me get back into the bed so they could check me, I was now at 4cm .
By that time, 3:30 AM, the doula arrived. I was really struggling with keeping control, and I was lacking confidence. I was thinking at this point that there was no way I would be able to handle birth without an epidural. The nurse informed me that they would have to call in the anesthesiologist and it could take a whole hour before he got there. So the doula talked me out of an epidural and told me that there were other "safer" medications I could use. At 3:45 AM Nubain was given through my IV. This is a narcotic that promotes rest during labor. It helps women take little naps between contractions. It isn't the strongest drug given but it lessens your pain perception. Pretty much it took off the edge. This almost instantly helped and calmed me down. I was then able to regain control and confidence.
At 4:00 AM I was very controlled and focused. The medicine helped me want to work with my coach, and making me less grumpy. I was doing excellent on my breathing technique. :D At this point I was tired and falling asleep during contractions. My husband also commented that I was very funny and loopy (due to the medication).
At 4:35 AM my contractions increased in intensity, by that time I was at 6cm with the baby's "head way down".
At 4:45 AM I was very nauseous again. Every contraction made me feel like I was going to loose my cookies, that was one of the worst parts. I was told during labor that it is common for women to be nauseous during labor and delivery...how come no one warned me? Seriously, I was SO sick. I guess not having morning sickness came back to bite me at the worst possible moment. :D I was given medication for nausea through my IV. At this point my contractions were very strong and I had quick peaks, and little time in between them. Some of the time I had one contraction right after the one before had stopped, without a brake.
At 5:00 AM I was feeling a lot of back labor. I was continually arching my back to try and relieve the pain. My second dose of Nubian was given through my IV. This time, the medication didn't work as well due to my contractions being SO hard. The doula told me that the way I felt my contractions were not like most women. She said instead of starting and slowing working up to the peak of the pain and then slowly going back down, my contractions just peaked. Because of my pain tolerance I could only feel the most painful part of the contraction. It was good and bad. It was good because my contractions were sort, but they were really MEAN and they would blindside me.
At 5:20 AM I was to 7cm. YEAH, I was feeling elated and felt the urge to push. I would push lightly to help with the urges. The nurse would discourage me from pushing because they didn't want me to bruise my cervix, in fear it would swell and close instead of open.
At 5:40 AM I was discouraged. I felt like I couldn't go on. The medication was no longer helping, my contractions were to strong. My doula gave me a speech, she told me that this is what every mother has to do to birth their baby. She explained it was hard, but the hardest things in life are worth the outcome. She reminded me that the contractions would not get any harder and I only had a little longer to go. She reminded me that I could do this, that I was doing it like it or not. I just needed to do it a little while more. She gave me what I needed to go on.
At 6:00 AM I was 9cm still feeling encouraged and still very nauseous.
At 6:20 AM I was FINALLY to 10cm. I began gentle pushing waiting for the doctor to come in. I thought this was always the fastest part for women. For me the pushing was one of the longest parts. I enjoyed it, but became discouraged when they told me I could push for hours and hours. That was the wrong time for them to tell me the truth (they could have lied). It made me sad to hear that news.
At 6:30 AM the doctor was there and I began pushing powerfully, very focused. This was my favorite part. I actually got to help do something. It felt way better to push than to sit in pain doing NOTHING. The Dr. would come in, check me and walk back out. I guess he could tell that I wasn't making a ton of progress with pushing. I was a little sad that I went to him for 9 months and he didn't have much to do with labor. All he really did was catch Drake at the very end.
I wasn't in pain now, instead of just enduring contractions, I got to help while the contractions were going on. Because it was taking a long time to get him out they asked if I would like a mirror so I could see what was happening a little better. I loved having a mirror. It really helped my delivery, I could see what they meant by "that's a good push". It was a really cool thing to watch.
I must have been getting close because the Dr. asked if he could perform and episiotomy on me. I had actually researched this. That might sound dumb, but it is actually better to tear and heal than for them to cut you. If they cut you then there is more layers of skin that have to heal, and they normally cut to much. The reason doctors do this is so it is easier for them to sew you up, it is easier to sew a straight line, rather than a tear. SO, I told the Dr, NO. He acted upset with me. But I am the patient, I have my rights. He asked me a couple more times, but I just said no, I rather you didn't.
At 7:22 AM I delivered a healthy son. Once his head was out he fell into the doctors hands. His head had a massive cephalhematoml (it is a big bruise/blood blister that forms between the skull and skin of the head. because he was sitting so low for the last 2 months of pregnancy. He knocked my pelvis so much he was really swollen. I wish I would have gotten a head measurement, but I didn't. His head was really big, so they figured that was why it took so long for me to deliver him. They figured if his head wasn't swollen he would have been a lot easier to get out. I am so grateful he didn't get stuck. ;D Once he was out they suctioned his lungs to make sure he didn't get any fecal matter in his lungs. Both of us were healthy and doing well. We named him Drake Rhett Bingham. He was 8 pounds 1 ounce, 20.5 inches long.
After he was out, I still had to deliver the after birth. Kade cut the cord, then I had to work at the after birth. That actually was really painful. No one of course warned me because most women are numb. Your contractions don't stop until after everything is out of you.
After that, the nurses push on your stomach to help make sure it is all out. That is also painful, mostly because the nurses are not that nice about kneading your now flabby stomach.
The doctor then gave me some local anesthetic so he could sew me up. I tore about half an inch on one side. He wanted to cute me on both. So I am glad I told him no, because I only had to deal with one pair of stitches instead of two. The doctor must have forgotten that I didn't have an epidural because he didn't wait for the medicine to kick in before he started sewing me up. So I could feel every needle poke until it started to take effect.
Everything was normal after that other than I dropped a clot as big as a large cantaloupe when I tried going to the bathroom. If Kade hadn't had been there to help I would have passed out. I am grateful for my wonderful husband who stood by me through this whole 5 hour ordeal. He is amazing.
I would have to say that was the hardest thing I have ever done. It was really painful and I swore for about 4 weeks after that I wouldn't have another kid because they hurt to much. I have already forgotten how terrible it was. So I am sure we will have another kid someday not to far away.
All in all I wish I would have known a lot more going in than I did. Believe me I did a lot of research and I still wasn't prepared. It was way more messy and Icky than I thought it would be. Plus the pain was nothing compared to anything I had ever felt. I was told after that when you have a fast labor like mine, that it is called fast and furious. When labor is quick, the contractions are meaner and a lot faster. So I guess I don't feel that bad about complaining now that I know my labor and delivery was meaner and faster than other peoples.
If I could go back, I would have liked to watch a real labor and delivery before trying to do it with so little knowledge.
I am so grateful for Drake. That was the hardest thing I have ever done, but it was worth the outcome. Love you Drake.
Thanks so much for your help Susan! Couldn't have done it without an epi without you.
If you look at the left side of his head you can see the purple spot. He looks like he has a cone head, but it was only swollen on one side so it was really a large bump on his head.
so handsome :D
Monday, January 3, 2011
Waving goodbye to 2010, Hello 2011
Wow, 2010 has been a hard year for sure, but one of the best so far. Looking back at the ups and downs of the year, I can hardly believe what has gone on. But here I am, a stronger, and hopefully a better person. I did get the best Christmas present of all, my beautiful boy. I still cannot believe that God could entrust me with such a perfect little one.
For new years eve we went and saw Tron. Kade absolutely loved the movie but I am not so sure that it was that good. The movie and graphics were great but I hated the ending. oh well, 3D rocks.
After the movie we cuddled up and we watched the ball drop on TV. My favorite part was planting a big ol' kiss on my hubby. I love him so much and am grateful I get to have Kade for time and all eternity.
I am very hopeful that 2011 will be great. BRING IT!!!!
For new years eve we went and saw Tron. Kade absolutely loved the movie but I am not so sure that it was that good. The movie and graphics were great but I hated the ending. oh well, 3D rocks.
After the movie we cuddled up and we watched the ball drop on TV. My favorite part was planting a big ol' kiss on my hubby. I love him so much and am grateful I get to have Kade for time and all eternity.
I am very hopeful that 2011 will be great. BRING IT!!!!
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