5th Anniversary

Last night we celebrated 5 years being married! CrAZy!

It feels like a short amount of time, but at the same time I feel like we have been together our whole lives! 

Kade got the day off work and we went to lunch with the kids. It was a treat for them because we haven't eaten out much lately. In fact other then a lunch date with grandpa we haven't eaten out in a month. Which is huge!

We decided this year we would go to a movie, no gifts. We had some free movie tickets which was extra awesome! Kade arranged the night (which was so nice) and we dropped off the oldest two and headed to Mockingjay part one. I love, love that our anniversary always falls on the week of a big release movie. Lex slept through the movie and it was a great little getaway. 

Spending most of the day with our little family reminds me how blessed I am to have had this life for the last 5 years. 

Labor Day Birthday (LONG POST)

Just a warning, I leave nothing out of this post, so if you find birth stories gross, STOP NOW! ;)

On Sunday the 31st of August, we were chilling. I was 5 days past my due date! I decided to shower and try to take a nap because I had been having false labor on and off for a week, always during the night time when I should be sleeping, and always so disappointing when the contractions stopped.   With my hair wet I layed on the couch watching phineas and ferb with the kids. I felt a little trickle of water, my eyes widened and I yelled, Kade! He watched me in awe as I ran to the bathroom, water slowly coming through my pants. I went to the bathroom sat on the toilet and there was a large gush. My water had broken! Kade ran around gathering things for the kids overnight bag and our hospital bag. I was in no hurry. No contractions had started and I figured we had a little time until I felt pain.

My thoughts at this point, I have an hour or two before my labor starts, once it does, I will go fast and have my sweet baby here before the day is through. After all this was my third and my first two were fast and never more then 5 hours of labor.  My hopes and thoughts couldn't have been more wrong.

Me on the drive to the hospital.

Around 2 we arrived at the hospital. I was gsb positive and they started me on antibiotics pretty quickly. After answering a ton if questions They checked me for the first time around 4. I was at a 2 with 50% effaced. I hadn't had any regular contractions and the ones I had I didn't feel much. I knew again it would be a while because I hadn't' started labor.   

After two rounds of antibiotics they let me start walking around hoping it would bring labor. The rule was 5 hrs after my water broke if I didn't progress I would have to have intervention. They let me go longer then that. They checked me at eight and I was at a 3.5 with 75% effaced. So they let me keep trying to bring labor on myself because I had shown signs of progressing. At this point I could feel baby contractions they were far apart and not consistent at all. 

At this point I was discouraged that everything was taking so long. I haven't ever had a problem progressing. Plus I was 5 days past due. I figured my body and baby would be ready. 

At around 11 I was checked again. Was barely a four and still 75% effaced??? I want progressing. Did I mention all this time was spent walking circles around the hospital?  I think we wore the carpet down....

3 am and I was at the same place. Just at a four...contractions were getting stronger but they were still far apart and not consistent. They gave me the news that it was time to start pitocin.  Kade and I talked about it and figured we might as well not fight it, after all, I was tired of being pregnant and tired of walking, they started me on the lowest dose. I talked with the nurse and asked what the odds would be of having a natural birth with no epidural while being on pitocin?  She told me in her many years of experience she had never seen anyone do it.   That was disheartening, but labor was already not what I expected it to be, so I thought maybe I could do it still....another hr went by with no progress. So they bumped up the pitocin. And in another hour I was bumped up one more time. Then the contractions started. 

They were terrible. They were the strongest ones I have ever felt. I never had that strong of contractions unless I was in transition and ready to push. I was checked again I was at a 5 and still 75% effaced. It was around 6am. I was so discourage that I only was to a 5 so I asked for some iv medication. Which helped me for about a half hour. It started to wear off quickly and I started to be negative about how I couldn't make it through. They checked me again and I was still the same. I was crying more like sobbing at the fact that my body wasn't reacting how I wanted it to. I felt like I couldn't keep going it had already been 17 hours. The midwife explained that at 18 hours after membrane rupture that they would be worried about infection, especially since I had the gsb. So I had an hour before we started talking more drastic interventions, things like c section. Looking back I really think they were trying to scare me, but my normal midwife was out of town for the holiday, and she wasn't very happy about how everything was handled.  

They believed baby was face up and unable to turn and that was why I want progressing. Worried and being in so much pain I gave in. I asked for an epidural. I cried during the whole thing. I felt like I had chosen comfort over what was best for baby. TOTALLY CRAZY HORMONES! But I still wonder if I would have waited just a little longer if he would have come just as fast. I had the anesthesiologist come in  around 6:45. While sitting up and having it placed I stared feeling super nauseous and that is always a sign that I am hitting transition, but nothing was the same for this labor so I figured it was a reaction to the pitocin.  The anesthesiologist was super quick and awesome, I felt like a hundred bucks after it was placed.  I was numb they told me to try and sleep, they figured it would be a while.  They left me alone.  Kade immediately fell asleep BUT I couldn't sleep at all.  I was having strange pressure. I couldn't be ready to push already?  I was at a 5 a few minutes ago?  I waited almost a half hour before I got the nerve and called the nurse back in. After all I couldn't possibly be ready to push..one look and they grabbed gloves and the on-call midwife.   I had them grab a mirror as well, with Drake I was able to watch in the mirror, and it was super cool, so I wanted the chance again.  As soon as everyone was in place I started to push I believe it was close to 7:20. At 7:27am Mr. Lex Logan Bingham was born! 

They held him up and Kade yelled enthusiastically that it was a boy. It was the coolest thing, finding out at birth. I was sure he was a girl and couldn't believe it.   I was overjoyed to have another boy.  

The nurse joked that it took so long for Lex to come because we kept calling him a girl.  It took days for it to sink in that it was a boy and not a girl.  I had only washed girl cloths in preparation for the birth and the boy clothes were still in storage, that is how positive I was that he was a girl.  

I fed him right away and he latched like a champ. Baby's cord was attached to the side of my uterus and I guess when that happens the cord is weaker. Once the placenta finally was delivered there was a large hole where the cord was tearing off from the placenta.  Because of the hole the midwife almost pulled out the cord without all of the placenta. Which could have caused major infection and problems. 

What a large boy! 9pounds 6ounces, 21.5 inches long,  I didn't need stitches wahoo! Recovery was so slow and I never remembered being so sore. But I didn't remember labor being that horrible, I felt as though I was being ripped in half, like I was going to die.  My cramping after was terrible, as bad as some of my contractions.  But we made it! 

They told me that often when baby is face up during delivery an epidural can relax your uterus enough to let them turn. They thought he was face up and that is why I didn't progress.  Or maybe I was closer then I thought to delivery and I just needed another half hour??? Who knows!

I had to stay at the hospital for 2 days, he was a big boy and they wanted to monitor his blood sugar to make sure he wasn't diabetic.  Also I was GSB positive with my membrane being ruptured for a long time, all of those reasons made for a long hospital stay.  Lucky for baby I had 3 rounds of antibiotics for GBS to help keep him safe.

I visited with my midwife when she got back from vacation, I really wished she would have been in town!  That was the biggest letdown, not having her help me through labor.  I absolutely think the world of her and the other midwife was okay, but not the support I needed.  She told me if she would have been in town and notified she would have told me to stay at home until 24 hours or until my labor started on its own.  She wouldn't have made me come in and spend time in the hospital, and then I would't have had pitocin and other interventions until I needed them.  So for the next labor I will know better :)

We are so blessed to have Lex and even though labor didn't go as planned he is here, he is healthy, and we love him.

Now does anyone know when the pain from the epidural insertion goes away?  

Eating our Birthday Dinner, it was some yummy steak!

Baby holding dads hand!

BABY MEETS WORLD!

My wonderful Grandparents, G&G Kunz

Lex's Grandparents 

I LOVE this picture, dad and son

mom and son

Sister kisses

they were so excited and in aww

just the three of us

YAY, we are a family of 5, I am so full of love and joy!

Valentines Day 2013

On Monday we headed to town, because Kade got paid and we went to pay some bills.  After we had a nice dinner at Olive Garden...it was an early Valentines date.  On Valentines day, Kade surprised me with a dozen roses, and cutesy necklace(the kids immediately broke).  It was sweet of him.  I love how thoughtful he is.  He always tries to take care of me, I sure lucked out.  We defiantly are not the perfect couple, but he makes me a better, kinder, more patient woman.  This life is about becoming better, and with Kade I have become so much better.  Love you babe.

Anniversary Date

Kade took me out to dinner for our anniversary, the kids got to come.  We tend to have bad luck with people canceling last minute.  It was great, we still had fun.

He spoiled me.  We went to eat where I wanted to go, wingers. Then he took me an the kids to breaking dawn part two.  

It was pretty good, all of it, even having the kids with us.  

Thanks honey, love you lots.

Drake drake most of the milkshake we shared, lol.  He is a sugar bug for sure. 

3 Year Anniversary

Today marks 3 years.  I love my husband, he is awesome.

We went out to eat at Wingers, I really like that place.  We had a fun time, ate too much, went to the temple, and watched the new Twilight movie.  I had a great time.  I cannot believe it has already been 3 years!  3 down, forever and ever to go :) Love you Mr. Kade.

30 Days of Thanks Day 2 - Health

I never realized how unbelievably blessed I was health wise until my appendectomy over a month ago.  I have never been hospitalized except for when I had babies.  No one in my little family has never been really sick, and I have only lost a select amount of relatives to death.
I was really thrown through a loop when I had surgery and was only able to lift 20 lbs for months after.  I was really blessed to have all the love and support I needed from the ladies in my church and from some family.

(getting ready to leave the hospital after surgery)

 I was not able to hold my kids let alone change their diapers without help.  Granted the soreness went away within a week and I was back, but it was pretty hard.  The hardest part was knowing how much my kids needed me and I was unable to do anything.  With both kids being so little they both would say mommy and want me to hold them.  It may not seem hard, but this was a big trial in my life at the time.
And even today when I just want them to be quiet and leave me be for a minute, I am so glad that I have the ability to fulfill my calling as a mother.  I am so grateful that I have the strength to lift them up, kiss them, change them, feed them, and just love them.
I don't understand having a sick child or husband, or even the understanding of me being really sick.  I did get a gimps of how scary and unfair life can be.  What an eye opener.

So, now when I think about what I am so blessed to have, my health and strength is at the top of my list, along with the health and strength of my family. It is something a lot of us take for granted.  I hope to never overlook this amazing blessing again.

Stress

Did I mention that I joined a biggest loser FB club?  Yeah, and so far we have been doing it 5 weeks, 3 left in the time I have been doing it I have lost 15 pounds!  I have been in 1st place the last 2 weeks...so maybe I will actually  win the $230 prize.  I will keep my fingers crossed, and keep off the chocolate.

These are my before pictures....except I took them about 2 weeks after I started.  These are motivating because they remind me of my maternity pictures I took, what a belly!   

I don't look any better and it discourages me because all I have done to lose weight is have my appendix out, stayed sick for 2 weeks following that, and cut out most of my sugar.  :D

I wasn't going to post about it at all but I got excited that I am in the lead 2 weeks in a row!

Apart from procrastinating my midterms in school, we have been moving a lot lately   Kade doesn't get off of work until six and it only stays light for an hour after that.  So, every time we go to move and get stuff done, we don't get a lot done.   We are out of the little white house in Mud Lake, all of that stuff is in boxes in the new house in Mud Lake.  We went last night to the house in IF and the upstairs got cleaned, and the downstairs got pushed into a corner???  Yeah, Kade's alternator went out in his truck so we were unable to pull a trailer to haul the rest of our stuff.

His alternator? In his new truck?  Yes, that is our luck.

But he can replace it himself so it will be about $120 for a new one :( but that is all it will cost and that is with his parts discount....at least we wont have to replace the batteries as well.  It would have been 400 for new batteries  whooo, good thing we didn't need to replace those.


On a happy last note, because not much is happy on this post, my friends Brad and Nikki Black are in the hospital right now having baby number 2!

BIG UNKNOWN

Kade got a new job... details later.

We are most likely moving due to the job change... EEK 

We don't know where we will live.  RENT? BUY? MOVE IN WITH OTHERS?

Unsure of what to do with our half finished home.  Sale? Rent?

And as far as my job and school, yeah not sure what I will be doing there.  Will I travel, transfer, or put it off?

I feel kind of lost right now, I hate the waiting period.  Where you just have to be patient and let thing work themselves out.  Too many unknowns and ifs in this situation.  I am excited for out new adventure and its outcome.  Just a little nervous and anxious about the journey to get there.

Summer Heat

Basically our house almost caught on fire today!  OKAY, I am exaggerating.  We own a corner lot, so you can see into your front yard and backyard if you drive or walk by.  This is annoying because if we so much as park in the wrong place in our backyard we get a note from the city saying that you better move it or we will be fined.  DUMB.  This is what we get for living in the city.  ANYWAY.  Today we were cleaning our yard because we had a complaint about some fencing in our yard...to tell you the truth our yard had gotten pretty messy.  With Kade gathering things from peoples homes and him having no time to finish half done projects, it got quite messy.  So, we needed to clean our yard...but I was complaining because I hate being forced to do things....always have always will.  When I was grudgingly cleaning the backyard I noticed our neighbors backyard.  He had this massive stack of firewood that was messy and really old.  I don't think he has used it in the 3 years we have lived here.  I kind of got grumpy because he has a mess too but because it is firewood it can be as messy as he wants.  You are allowed to have firewood in your yard, but not fence posts.

Around noon a neighbor calls me up and said, "hey, did you know there is a fire in your back yard?"  UM WHAT!  The fire inspector declared that it was arson, and that someone perposly set the neihgbors old firewod on fire.  It was old wood, and very dry, plus there is coton in ther air from the trees...so it lit up pretty good.  There were 2 firetrucks at our house.  We share a fence line with this neighbor and it burned up some of our lawn.

This morning we mowed our very long dry grass and weeds.  We put away a lot of wood that was laying on the fence line,  we moved a gas can full of gas off from the fence to the garage.  Who knew that a threat from the city to clean up our lawn was a blessing in disguise?  Okay, so no one knows if it would have burned our house down, but this morning we had really long grass and a lot of flammable things on our fence line that went strait to our home.

No one knows who started the fire, they think maybe some neighborhood kids...all I know is that we are lucky nothing important was burned.

I am bummed I didn't get any firetruck pictures :(

I am grateful that I am blessed and kept out of harms way.  Our family is truely bessed, today could have turned out a lot different if we wouldn't have listend to the city :D

2012 YAY

Last night we went and partied with Brad, Nikki, and Braelie their daughter. We watched the movie Columbiana and ate treats. It was fun to socialize and get out of the house. Plus I got my new years kiss, awww.... I wonder if I will ever grow out of loving the new years kiss. I sure hope not!

We kissed in front of the clock, to prove it was midnight, but you cant read it LOL!

I am happy to be done with 2011! This last year has been probably the hardest one yet. I know I will always have my challenges, but I am hoping this year is less stressful, or my heart is going to wear out by the time I'm 25. LOL

I know now that I have two kids life wont get easy, but I love Kade, and I am willing to face what ever my father in heaven throws my way.

Feelings/Thoughts ~RANDOM~ but mine.

I feel FREE, and it is amazing. ;D Probably has a lot to do with the fact that Kade and I are the only adults in the house now!  WAHOO!

I am not exactly free though...cuz today is the last day of summer for me. I am so excited, but very nervous to start school. I feel like things haven't completely fallen into place, but they are getting there.

I have this bad habit where I look at everyone around me and wish my life was as perfect as theirs...I know no one has a perfect life, but they make it seem that way.

I think Facebook really has an effect on me.  When I am on it a lot, I covet and wish my life was more like someone else's...when I don't even know what their life is like.  I am always wanting more, more, more...I need to  try harder to put off the natural man I guess.

Sometimes I really feel picked on like I can't handle all the things I am supposed to. Pretty soon I will have two babies, and I am not sure why I am trusted with that HARD blessing.   Heavenly Father is all knowing and I just have to close my eyes and breath, knowing it will all be okay, we are living on prayers at our house!

 Heavenly Father is always watching my back, I don't know why I second guess him, after all he is God, through him all things are possible. Some days I wonder how the bills will be paid and then we are blessed and able to make it through the month...we are pretty lucky.  Things are always happening that give me such strong faith in HIM and His plan.  I feel like our family is the saying...we may not have it all together, but together we have it all.  My children truly bring joy into my home that I could get no other way.  We are blessed as a family to have each other.

I love that I am so blessed with the family I have. I don't know if they feel the same way, but our relationships are so unique and perfect in there own ways.

Last of all, Kade.  He is wonderful and puts up with my mood swings and crazy days.  I don't know how I got so lucky to have a man in my life that always treats me like a princess.

Although life is ruff and you never know what is around the corner, I know my family will always be there, we can be together forever!

Jacob & Trecia Butt

At 12:30pm today my sister and her now husband were sealed for time and all eternity. YAY

Well it was a long day to say the least. I am kinda glad it is over. Kade and I are bad, we skipped out as soon as we could :D. But Drake looked so cute in his bow tie. See what I mean.

I'm such a mom bragging about my kid. :D

Anyway, I had a chance to follow the photographer around and I got some shots. It was fun. Even if they weren't looking at the camera lol.

It was fun to see everyone who made it.

I was bummed because Drake and I didn't get a picture together, just the two of us. Someday I will force Kade to take pictures.